pcl_0534_155_08_41

Puddleby Court Log: 65 Spring, year 534 of The Ascendancy. 08:41

In the matter of Malkor v Chums Mother, accused of “impersonation and harassment”

Before the jurors: Magnels, Waylander, Ther' Anger, WhiteAngel, Madcat, LonesomeDove, Algernon, Phineas, Noah, Devil

With Bellafae serving as Bailiff.
To all who read these precepts, the following transcript of this trial is true and correct, to the best of my knowledge.
Clera, reporting.

[Bellafae] This court is now in session, The Honourable Judge Haengemie presiding.
[Haengemie] <standard pre-trial court briefing>
[Malkor] First off...
[Malkor] I'd like to apologize for the accused not appearing on time...
[Malkor] Greetings everyone. I'm sorry to drag you to court today, but I think that this is worthy of your attention.
[Malkor] Chum may not be well-liked...
[Malkor] but that is no excuse for snerts and imposters like "Chums Mother" to spread slander against him.
[Malkor] She obviously can't be Chum's mother because, well, she's a halfling.
[Malkor] She only assumed the name to harass Chum and the good citizens of Puddleby.
[Malkor] A few examples:
[Malkor] "shutup you little cheating chum stealing weakling"
[Malkor] "dirty bastard...the only word that comes to mind"
[Malkor] "Hey I'm Chums mother....you know chum, the gay fag who walks around town?"
[Malkor] But I'll let you here her story...
[Haengemie] 10 seconds remaining, Please finish up, or say "done"...
[Malkor] witness: Chumsmother
[Haengemie] Thank you, Malkor
[Malkor] witness: Chumsmother
[Haengemie] Chums Mother, please approach the witness railing, to the Northeast of the jury box. You have 15 seconds.
[Haengemie] Thank you, Chums Mother. You have been called to testify in this matter, please state the pertinant facts to the jury.
[Haengemie] Chums Mother, you have 90 seconds to speak.
[Chums Mother] I did NOT say any of that stuff
[Chums Mother] ;)
[Chums Mother] so THERE!
[Chums Mother] well...ok...I guess I did
[Chums Mother] so I'll just sit here for a while
[Chums Mother] Chums Mother sighs
[Chums Mother] I guess I'm done
[Haengemie] 10 seconds remaining, Please finish up, or say "done"...
[Chums Mother] done
[Haengemie] Thank you, Chums Mother
[Haengemie] Chums Mother, you have 90 seconds to speak.
[Chums Mother] weee!
[Chums Mother] mwa ha ha ha ha
[Chums Mother] hehe
[Chums Mother] I can talk but can't yell
[Chums Mother] strange...
[Chums Mother] heh
[Chums Mother] done
[Haengemie] Thank you, Chums Mother
[Haengemie] Malkor, you have 120 seconds to speak.
[Malkor] This woman's insanity is apparent from her defense...
[Malkor] I'm afraid the poor halfling actualy believes she is Chum's mother...
[Malkor] and her mental condition makes her a menace to our society...
[Malkor] That is why I am asking the jury to find her guilty and lock him up for the maximum amount of time possible.
[Malkor] ... for her well-being good as well as our own.
[Malkor] Malkor looks at the pitiful, deranged halfling.
[Malkor] You'll get the help you need.
[Malkor] done
[Haengemie] Thank you, Malkor
[Haengemie] Chums Mother, you have 120 seconds to speak.
[Chums Mother] witness chumsmother
[Chums Mother] how do I call a witness?
[Chums Mother] witness: chumsmother
[Haengemie] Thank you, Chums Mother
[Haengemie] Chums Mother, please approach the witness railing, to the Northeast of the jury box. You have 15 seconds.
[Haengemie] Thank you, Chums Mother. You have been called to testify in this matter, please state the pertinant facts to the jury.
[Haengemie] Chums Mother, you have 120 seconds to speak.
[Chums Mother] why!?!?!
[Chums Mother] why why why!?!??!?!?!?
[Chums Mother] I said all that stuff....
[Chums Mother] its not MY fault I'm Chum's mother
[Chums Mother] and I can't control what sexual prefrences Chum has
[Chums Mother] Hes just my son...
[Chums Mother] er...daughter
[Chums Mother] I think...I don't know...
[Chums Mother] maybe hes both
[Chums Mother] wheeeeeeeeeeeee!
[Haengemie] 10 seconds remaining, Please finish up, or say "done"...
[Chums Mother] 10435891498057091875498174359081475908167457415618475689176435829317465872361458143596717489561984756891746589147365897234658924375683492756184957681947568914756819754682q97645841273658149735681452973682147539628934756829317564
[Chums Mother] wheeeeeeeee!
[Haengemie] Thank you, Chums Mother
[Chums Mother] noo!
[Haengemie] <standard jury verdict briefing>
[Bellafae] Bellafae hands Haengemie the jury's verdict.

[Haengemie] Malkor this court has found your case frivolous.
[Haengemie] <standard jury sentence briefing>
[Haengemie] Jury, please note: one prior conviction in the past year.
[Haengemie] And, because I find the friviolity of this case to be contemptuous,...
[Haengemie] I'm going to double the maximum penalty (240 min/2000 c)
[Haengemie] I suggest that the jury recommend a stiff sentence.
[Haengemie] Jurors, you should take Malkor's record into account when deciding what sentence to recommend.
[Bellafae] Bellafae hands Haengemie the jury's sentencing recommendation.

[Haengemie] Malkor, you are hereby sentenced to spend 120 minutes in the Puddleby jail,
[Haengemie] and fined 500 coins.
[Haengemie] As you cannot afford to pay your fine, the clerk calculates the balance (499c) as additional jail-time of 101 minutes.
[Haengemie] Also, Clera will help you arrange a payment plan.

Court adjourned at 10:13 on 65 Spring, 534