pcl_0538_290_10_14

Puddleby Court Log: 20 Autumn, year 538 of The Ascendancy. 10:14

In the matter of Lacan v Bigfat's, accused of “Spilling my cocktail all over my shirt.”

Before the jurors: Neige, Shard, Minathel, Ugh, Reye, Chris Rex, Revlis

The Honourable Judge Haengemie, presiding.
With Bellafae serving as Bailiff.

To all who read these precepts, the following transcript of this trial is true and correct, to the best of my knowledge.
Clera, reporting.

[Haengemie] <standard pre-trial court briefing>
[Lacan] I was sitting there, while Bigfat's was [censored].
[Lacan] Just Minding my own buisness, drinking my cocktail!
[Lacan] The Cocktail costed 20 coins, I DEMAND vengence!!
[Lacan] he ran buy, and spilled it!
[Lacan] ALL OVER my forest green shirt!
[Lacan] done
[Haengemie] Thank you, Lacan
[Haengemie] Bigfat's, you have 90 seconds to speak, unless the jury deems your testimony irrelevant.
[Bigfat's] Hmm...
[Bigfat's] It was a nice looking cocktail...
[Bigfat's] but how do we know you didn't slip and make that stain yourself?
[Bigfat's] Bigfat's winks and coughs.
[Bigfat's] I did not spill his damn cocktail!
[Bigfat's] or was it tail cock
[Bigfat's] id unno
[Bigfat's] but
[Bigfat's] his shirt is fine
[Bigfat's] all it needs is a little hot wax...
[Haengemie] 10 seconds remaining, Please finish up, or say "done"...
[Bigfat's] and some stain remover probably...
[Bigfat's] done
[Haengemie] Thank you, Bigfat's
[Haengemie] Lacan, you have 120 seconds to speak, unless the jury deems your testimony irrelevant.
[Lacan] Bigfat's was [censored] I turned to retch, and there he was, maliciously spilling my cocktail!
[Lacan] These type of actions should NOT be tolerated! I DEMAND Justice!
[Lacan] My Shirt costed 2000 coins! and here it is, RUINED!!
[Lacan] I can't have a shit with cocktail on it
[Lacan] I can't have a shirt with cocktail on it
[Lacan] once again, I want justice!
[Lacan] I would hope you, the jurors would not stand for this sort of thing!
[Lacan] done
[Haengemie] Thank you, Lacan
[Haengemie] Bigfat's, you have 120 seconds to speak, unless the jury deems your testimony irrelevant.
[Bigfat's] tailcocks don't need justic, they just need hot wax, stain remover, and a new cocktail....
[Bigfat's] i would be glad to replace your cocktail and your shirt...
[Bigfat's] i mean tailcock
[Bigfat's] or is it cocktail
[Bigfat's] i mean tailcock
[Bigfat's] anyway
[Bigfat's] Duh, this is friv and shouldn't be settled here...maybe....Torr Inn...but not here...
[Bigfat's] oh
[Bigfat's] done
[Haengemie] Thank you, Bigfat's
[Haengemie] <standard jury verdict briefing>
[Bellafae] Bellafae hands Haengemie the jury's verdict.

[Haengemie] Bigfat's this court finds you innocent. You are free to go.
[Haengemie] Judge Haengemie bangs his gavel
[Haengemie] This court is adjourned.